FRIENDS

FRIENDSHIP is such a beautiful thing especially when two people truly appreciate and respect each other, and when the feeling is mutual. Friends should bring you joy and make you grow, they are a core part of life, having friends that you trust and love is essential to your well being.  I treat mine like I would like to be treated - I love them and wish them happiness.

« Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom ». - Marcel Proust -

I once had a friend that I trusted, but the relationship was unbalanced.  I would make her laugh when she was down; I’d send her gifts and fly to visit her every year.  I was her friend basically; but on many occasions she would say unkind things and I wouldn't say anything back. She didn't make me feel great about myself.

What this taught me is not blame the other person for being unkind or not returning what you have invested in the relationship, but to have self-respect and understand that people, whomever they are, will treat you the way you let them treat you.  Some people are simply unhappy or insecure and can’t return your kindness; and others are a little needy and may overwhelm you with a demanding friendship. If you have doubts about a friend ask yourself these questions:

Does this person make me happy? Can I be myself with this person? Does this person love me? Does this person lift my spirits and believe in my potential? Can I trust this person? When I think of this person, do I smile?

If most answers are 'NO' then protect your happiness and self-esteem, drift away gently without drama, sometimes the best thing to do is to do nothing. Some people only cross your path to teach you something, so learn and move on.

There are different types of friendships and some are hard to identify.  It is essential that you surround yourself with happy and positive people that assume the best in life, even when down moments hit unexpectedly hard. Do your best to be there for the people that are going through a hard time, the genuine friends that just need a little boost from a good person so they can find their smiley face again.

“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.” - Jim Morrison -

I’ve had a variety of friends, from wonderful to toxic, but I’m grateful to all of them because I have learnt so much through these different friendships.  As I understand more about the types of people in the world, I also have a better understanding about who to let in my life and who I should protect myself from.

IT TAKES ALL KINDS TO MAKE THE WORLD GO ROUND.

The Supportive Friend - Always ready to cheer. Everyone should have a cheerful friend that will support you and your dreams. This little gem will love you and be ready to fight your corner. They are true to you, they don’t gossip, they're rarely negative and they remind you what a fantastic person you are. Treat those friends like diamonds, if you lose them they will be difficult to replace!

The Guru - The Guru is someone that gives you hints and clues on what to do when you are lost or not sure about the way forward. This friend always seems to know what to say and when to say it. They are truthful and they’ve experienced life and learnt their lessons. They sometimes go overboard and forget that everyone needs to make their own mistakes in order to learn the lessons. They have your best interests at heart because they love you and don’t want you to suffer.

The Comedian Friend - Nothing is that serious. The Comedian Friend makes you laugh, from your belly. They'll make your day with crazy stories. They have a gift to make people laugh and they’ll always see the positive side of any situation and make it into something funny. After having spent some time with this friend, you should have a smile on your face. Laughter is the best medicine. We all have a different sense of humour and sometime this friend is misunderstood and may offend people by joking about something sensitive.

The Good/ Best Friend - Everyone needs good and trustworthy friends in their life.  This friend sticks by you no matter what, because they love you and understand you like no one else. They would never would speak behind your back and don't judge you. Your best friend is the first person you call when you are down or going through hard times, also the one you call when you've got yourself in the “poo”, because they know that you are there for them, too. The relationship is balanced. They remember your birthday every year and celebrate the special moments. Some of your best experiences in life are with your best friend. I'm lucky to have a few of these gems in my life. I have experienced the craziest and funniest moments with them but also shared my tears and sadness, without these guys my life wouldn’t be what it is, they are my family.

The Toxic Friend - Vampire emotion, they suck the life out of you. The frustrating thing about this friendship is how it creeps up on you unexpectedly. Their negativity is astonishing, nothing is possible, and everything that happens to them is the end of the world. If you are sharing future plans with them, instead of cheering for your success they give you a list of bad things that might happen if you do it. Most conversations are about them and how unlucky they are. Usually these people don’t make you feel good about yourself and may even make you feel guilty to have what you have. They often knock your confidence down by throwing unkind comments your way to make themselves feel better. Knowing the signs of a toxic friend will help you to avoid remaining in such a friendship, or perhaps even developing one in the first place.

The Serial Canceller - You are disposable. This one has issues with time keeping and diary management. They will cancel on you all the time at the last minute. They know their craft and their excuses are original, but the truth is they simply can’t be bothered to meet you. Usually they will go quiet on you when they are busy and won’t have time to meet-up, but when they are bored they will know where to find you. If someone is not willing to make the effort to value your friendship, then move on. To them you are at their disposition and they will take advantage of your kindness.

The Taker Friend - An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of heartache. They will be happy to receive things from you, but you won’t see much from them. They love you when you pay the bills at the restaurants or when you spoil them with gifts on their birthday, but you won’t see a thing from them on your special days. They always borrow without giving back what they owe you and they always call you when they need something, but when you need something back they’re conveniently busy or unavailable. They are so happy to have you as a friend because you are generous. To be friend with a taker will drain you and lower your confidence, as you will be confused as to why you have given so much but received nothing in return. To avoid the heartache which may result from low self-esteem, you must walk away; they don’t deserve your time or your kindness.

Treat and love your friends like diamonds but do yourself a favor, walk away from negativity no matter what.

A few good friends is all you need.

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