YOUR MIND. Your best friend or your enemy?

Do you feel like you cannot escape your mind? The negative parroting of the same things over and over again, keeping you fearful and limited.  Let me tell you one thing that the parrot isn’t telling you, none of it is true. You just need to learn how to control your mind and keep it positive and rational.

Meditation is one of the ways and another is counselling.  They’re both efficient methods, however you must be dedicated as your mind will fight change, you’ll probably think something like -“You don't need to see anyone, you’re not crazy!”  Or, “You look so stupid in the lotus position, forget about it and watch TV.”

"You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind."  - Joyce Meyer -

Your mind’s biggest fear is change, it will try to convince you it won’t work, or that it’s too risky, or its number one excuse to stop you: what will people think? But it’s just fear, a fiction of your imagination, you just need to tell it that everything is going to be fine, I want to try this and I believe in myself. 

It is important to understand that the mind is primitive.  And, like anything primitive it needs to be tamed and developed in order to live a good life.  Once we gain control of it, it becomes a powerful ally with incredible abilities, just ask life’s high achievers.  Most of our negative thoughts are related to our past actions and mistakes, let’s call them life experiences; the judgement of others and the taking of risks to better our lives.  A weak mind will repeatedly ask itself the same insecure questions and may continually make bad choices.

“We deal with our mind from morning till evening, and it can be our friend or our worst enemy.” - Matthieu Ricard -

The fear of being alone with our thoughts is one of the reasons millions of people become workaholics, to avoid their mind working against them, they try to always stay busy.  It’s a coping mechanism that is very common. We try to forget our worries, our fears and our disappointments, by keeping busy to drown it all out. To a certain extent being active is a good way of diluting the negative thoughts, but it’s only a temporary solution, as eventually something would need to be done. We cannot bury our regrets and doubts forever, they will eventually resurface in your our minds, and the longer we wait, the harder it will be to deal with.

Seek professional help in order to find closure on what ever your personal demons might be.  Help yourself move forward, you are not perfect, just human.  We all face difficulties in our lives; no matter if we are rich or poor, young or old, female or male.

Life will make it difficult at times so we can learn something through the experience, but that’s to enable us to move onto our next chapter – so be patient, find the strength and don’t be too hard on yourself.

“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”  - Bruce Lee -

Unfortunately many can't see their way out of their mindset and situation.  They reach out for extreme alternatives to escape it all, and it often doesn't end very well. These people have simply lost hope. No situation is hopeless; your will and determination to overcome your doubts and fears will guide you, it is an inside job. Believe that you can turn things around, because no one can do it for you. 

Here’s a little secret, the mind can only hold one thought at the time so when a negative thought enters your mind, start doing something else, distract yourself; watch a comedy, read a book, call a friend, play upbeat music, temporary distractions are the glue between now and the time you gain control of your mind.

“There is no such thing as a hopeless situation. Every single circumstances of your life can change!” - Rhonda Byrne -  

Many people experience the same feelings and fears. Our mind will sometime tell us lies, where as our heart and guts cannot lie or be corrupted. That’s why it hurts so much when we don’t listen to either; neurologists have proven that when it comes to our moods, decisions and behaviour, the brain in our head is not the only one doing the thinking but our guts too (our second brain). 

- We are born with only two fears, the fear of falling and the fear of loud noise. Any other fears were acquired through life experiences. - 

Don’t let your problems and your way of coping with negative thoughts dictate how you live your life.  Don’t bury what is evident to you.  Remove it, or deal with it, as you will be missing out on an amazing life.  If you decide to let go of what you can’t control, you will instantly be a happier person, that includes family, other people’s judgements, what tomorrow will bring, how long you’ll live; basically anything you have no control over – Let it all go.

IF THERE IS A PROBLEM, THERE IS A SOLUTION; IF THERE IS NO SOLUTION, THERE IS NO PROBLEM.

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PANIC ATTACKS/ ANXIETY

Your heart is racing, your throat is tight and there’s a ball of lead in your chest. It’s one of the most uncomfortable feelings to experience and can seriously get in the way of your everyday life, but I have no doubt that it can be tamed and eventually disappear.

I'm not a doctor or a psychologist, just a person that has recently developed this weird feeling of panic and discomfort when threatened or faced with an alien situation. It's just my defense system going on full power and triggering a red alert, when most of the time it’s not needed.

All my life I heard people say, “I get panic attacks” or “I suffer from anxiety”, but I could never really relate to these people as I had never experienced it. 

"Fear cannot be banished, but it can be calm and without panic; it can be mitigated by reason and evaluation." - Vannevar Bush -

I'm a fairly confident person and I wear my heart on my sleeve, but for the last couple of years I have been faced with a series of non-positive situations and met some seriously unkind people. I was on the wrong frequency of life and attracted very unlikable things. I truly believe that all these experiences which have happened one after another have lowered my confidence and as a result my mind created a mechanism to protect itself, preventing them from happening again.

It’s a little bit like an allergic reaction when you eat or touch something and your body reacts fairly quickly so you have to take anti-histamine. The remedy to anxiety or panic attacks is love, reassurance and self-confidence. Your friends and family may help here by reminding you that nothing bad is going to happen but the main part needs to come from within you.

Life will throw you in the strangest, most uncomfortable and very challenging situations, and the more you want out of life, the harder it will be, however the rewards are absolutely magical if you hang on and keep going. Amazing things do come to those who wait, as long as they have the right attitude. 

My panic attacks are getting better at a steady pace and I believe that I can overcome this strange reactions to evocative or odd situations, I'm not the type of person to settle for what I have, so being faced with unknown situations or people cannot get in my way and it shouldn't for you too. You must find the cause of your anxiety and what triggers the panic attacks, for me it’s usually people or situations that have hurt me in the past, or something that reminds me of them like places with bad memories.

"Anxiety is love's greatest killer. It makes others feel as you might when a drowning man holds on to you. You want to save him, but you know he will strangle you with his panic." - Anais Nin -

So when the feeling is coming I tune my mind to happy things and remind myself of the beautiful and loving people in my life. At first it's hard but the more you train yourself to feel love and happiness, the stronger you will get; and one day ultimately you will be amazed that you no longer let your insecurities rule your life.

LIVE IN LOVE AND LEAVE THE FEAR.

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