BALI - the gratitude island.

This was my second time visiting this stunning island. I call it gratitude island, simply because this is where I truly understood the meaning of gratitude. The genuine smiles from the locals will always stay with me, as they are so rich within. They prioritise the human spirit and its needs, rather than simply material or physical things.

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.”  

- Melody Beattie -

It is so inspiring to watch hotels, shops, restaurants and homes present their offerings to the gods, they start each day with a blessing and with gratitude. This alone showed me that we should follow their example, and understand that we must find balance between the physical and nonphysical. Showing gratitude daily as we press on with our modern lives will help our deep emotional and physical imbalance. Too many people in developed countries have been conditioned to focus on problems rather than solving them; they’re drowning in depression and addiction instead of keeping the faith. They also chase money over wellbeing and a balanced life, and sadly, only believe in what they can see instead of believing, in order to create. Thoughts are the beginning of all things in our world.

Bali has so much to offer starting with the goodness of the locals, then all of its wonders: the secret sanctuaries; the peaceful temples, the hidden magical forests, and so much more. 

"Exploration is really the essence of the human spirit."  - Frank Borman -

My favourite place is the sacred Monkey Forest, what an experience that was! The monkeys are truly at peace. They’ll chase you around if you have bananas, and believe me, they won’t stop until they have them. These monkeys are such great entertainers. They can play for hours, trying to open your bags, bite your water bottles, and occasionally stealing anything you've left unprotected. They will also jump on you when you least expect it! My advice is to enjoy their presence, but don’t provoke them or try to touch them, they are animals with primitive instincts after all. It’s an amazing experience you will never forget!

The temples across Bali are majestic, they’re all as breath taking as each other, but many tourists miss out on the energy of these stunning temples.  For them its more about selfies than being in the moment and soaking up the vibes of thousands of years of history. You will have to wear a sarong to enter most temples as appropriate clothing is a must. Of all the temples that we visited Tanah Lot was my favorite. You can be blessed at the holy spring, emerging with grains of rice stuck to your forehead, which seem to remain stuck for a really long time.  You can also touch the head of a lucky snake in a cave opposite the holy spring, and both are said to bring peace and goodness into your life. The local guides will often recommend you to watch the sunset from Tanah Lot, and I can promise a spectacular view. If you hang around for a few minutes after sunset, you will also see the thousands of bats flying from their cave to hunt for food, but don't worry they won't come near you. Just imagine thousands of bats filling the sky, something you’ll only see once in a lifetime! Dracula would have been proud!

The beautiful waterfalls are not to be missed. Northern Bali has a stunning hidden heaven off the main tourist trail, with several shining waterfalls all in one spot. When the sun hits at a certain angle, it's like a shower of million diamonds falling from the sky and melting into the water. In the pool at the bottom there was a group of young local boys splashing in the water and enjoying their natural playground. If we could replace all the time that humans spent playing video games, watching TV or transfixed on their phone, by enjoying the wonders of Mother Nature, I believe our lives would be much more relaxed and fulfilled. 

“Travel brings power and love back into your life.” 

- Jalaluddin Rumi - 

Bali doesn't disappoint. It will enrich your soul, remind you of what’s important in life, show you the magnificence of mother nature, share its rich traditions, and feed you with its stunning and exotic fruits. It is simply a wonderful destination.

Travel the world, and bring some of their beautiful traditions and culture home! 
We have so much to learn from each other.

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INDIA THROUGH THE EYES OF ANON - "Guest post by ANON"

"One can become a strange mixture of East and West, out of place everywhere, at home nowhere; or being still oneself, one can learn to find oneself ‘in place’ anywhere and ‘at home’ everywhere, in the profoundest sense a citizen of the world". - A.K Coomaraswamy. -

I recently returned from a three month trip in India. As an Indian brought up in England, I have always been encouraged to have a voice, to have a career of my own and to be my own person. So for me, when I go back to India and see the life that women have to subscribe to, I can’t help thinking how different their life and choices are. Perhaps the word I am looking for is limited. And so I am going to illustrate this point with two examples of real-life situations. 

The first example involves a young lady. Let us call her Anjali. Anjali is a bright, articulate young lady. She has had all the privileges of a middle class upbringing in India and even completed her Masters degree overseas in Australia. She can speak at least three languages fluently and her spoken English is so clear and grammatically correct, one hardly notices her Indian accent.

Now Anjali is quite capable of working and is encouraged to work in professions such as IT or the family business. At home, Anjali excels in many hobbies which she loves such as needlework, classical music or dance.

She is in fact an all-rounder. She loves her fashion, she’s constantly on WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram and has a “real joie de vivre”. Of course Anjali is free to socialise and go out, go to movies, have dinner with friends but it is very unusual for her to go out on her own, and one would certainly never see Anjali hanging out with a boy. (I am not saying people in India don’t date, of course they do, but lets’ say they do it in a more discrete manner. For example, you very rarely see couples holding hands – the beach may be the only exception where this is seen – you certainly don’t see people kissing in public and in a nightclub it is highly unlikely that you would get some drunken, sweaty-faced guy who grabs you on the dance floor and lunges at you in the hope that your lips might lock!).

As Anjali approaches her mid to late 20s, she knows it will soon be time for her to get married. Her husband to-be is chosen by a word-of-mouth, a carefully researched, pre-selection process by her parents and extended family.

Anjali may be told she has the final say but the reality is that the pre-chosen match is the husband for her. And then comes the marriage. In some cases, the husband may be happy for her to continue working but in other cases, the husband may expect her to give up work, which Anjali will have to comply with, if the marriage is to be successful. And then the young married couple are very much expected to have a child within the first year of marriage – I know this for a fact because from my cousins who have all been married in the last ten years or so, contraception is not advised and in some cases forbidden. So what, I ask myself is the point in giving Indian girls a decent education, sending them abroad for further studies, only to encourage them and subscribe them to a marriage where they are taught to accept that the husband’s choice, his say: to accept that he is King? What happened to the Queen? The second example involves a young woman, which we will call Suetha. So Suetha got married to a very handsome, professional young man. Yes, her parents had chosen him as a suitable partner for her: all was good. They had three beautiful children together. All was going well. Suetha was absolutely devoted to her husband and family. They lived in a fabulous house, had lots of friends and generally were very happy together. 

But then after 20 years of marriage, her husband had an affair. This affair went on for many years. Suetha felt helpless. She could not really divorce him, because her main concern, living in a traditional Indian society, was that she wanted to get her children married and well settled in good families and she knew she would not be able to do that if she was a divorcee: it would reflect badly on her and on her family. In essence, her standing in the community would be tarnished. 

So Suetha decided to take no action and waited in the hope that her husband would ‘return’ to her. The husband in the meanwhile, became so brazen about the affair that he actually moved out of home, bought a new house with the mistress, who by the way, knew he was married with three children, and essentially lived with her as man and wife for about five years. The husband told his wife that the mistress ‘brought light into his life’.

Suetha decided to speak to her in-laws, in the hope that he could be persuaded to see sense and return home. Suetha was told by her father-in-law that her husband, his son, could do as he pleased. Suetha was expected to put-up and shut-up. Eventually, after some more ‘talking’ between the in-laws, the husband and Suetha, the husband did eventually decide to return home. He realised he missed his wife and children and ‘could not live without them’. However, before he returned home, Suetha was made to ask her parents-in-laws for forgiveness! Quite remarkable! For the sake of her children, Suetha did this. 

The family are now back together. It has not been a straightforward journey but they are a family once again, living under the same roof. It is not for me to comment on whether Suetha was right or wrong in her course of action. But what I do want to say is that the in-laws are the most hypocritical people on the planet. It seems that Indian society always blames the woman for a failing marriage. Period.

So, while the rest of the Western world is demanding that women should have equal pay in the workplace. I say that in India, women should have EQUAL place in the home and in a marriage.

ANON.


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